Sorry
04.06.09 (3:18 pm) [edit]
Not much to write right now. I've had a very difficult year so far, and it just got worse. My husband and I are splitting up. I'm not exactly a willing participant in all of this, but it seems I don't get a say. In addition, my house has gone back to the bank, and I recently had a breast cancer scare (I am fine, thankfully).
I'm sure you've noticed that I'm writing more here now. The simple fact is, I've got two kids to support, and no job or skills that could readily land me a job. I've done the ads before, and it's time to start them back up.
I'm just kind of bereft of anything meaningful to say right now. I apologize.
I'm sure you've noticed that I'm writing more here now. The simple fact is, I've got two kids to support, and no job or skills that could readily land me a job. I've done the ads before, and it's time to start them back up.
I'm just kind of bereft of anything meaningful to say right now. I apologize.
posted by: Ladyg (reply)
post date: 04.10.09 (12:12 am)
So sorry to hear about the split up and the house IG.
Thank God that the cancer scare was just that a scare.
You are very good with the ads so good luck with that and
I always loved reading your post and reviews on fashion, will
you do more of that? i used to look forward to your pictures
of the lastest designs.
I am glad that you are back, this is the place to get your feeling out, vent and just spend time with friends.
posted by: intricategirl (reply)
post date: 04.10.09 (5:29 am)
Reply to: Ladyg
The ads suck away at my soul. They always have. I hate interrupting my fun fashion time with a "word from our sponsor." lol
I'm going between thinking the split is such a great idea that we should have done it years ago, and thinking that it's so hard it's going to kill me. And I'm sure that's normal.
You are a very kind woman with a ton of class. Thank you so much for your support. I will try and come back and do more fashion posts, and do them more frequently. :)
posted by: PastorDave (reply)
post date: 05.14.09 (6:35 am)
Hey, I am sorry that I missed this important post. You're spitting up? I very much hate that. No couple makes a union, a marriage, thinking this will happen. There is so much that no one really know but the two of you, so really nobody can make a judgment call on this matter but yourselves. I am working with a couple right now who have a sordid story. they've been seperated for seveal months. Now, they are considering getting back together. The split gave them time to think, pray, and consider if they could perhaps approach the relationship again in a different way and maybe be more successful. It is going to be hard, and frankly the odds are against them, but I wish them well.
Work? You seem to me to be resourceful and smart and likeable, and so I think persons of such composition will do o.k. This was written by you seveal weeks ago, so I've a suspicion you've already found employment.
Cancer? Glad that was only a scare!
God bless, and I wish and pray for you the very best.
posted by: Kram1000 (reply)
post date: 05.14.09 (4:55 pm)
Hang in there things will resolve themselves eventually.
posted by: intricategirl (reply)
post date: 05.14.09 (4:57 pm)
Reply to: PastorDave
To be honest, it wasn't my choice. He left me for another woman, right in the middle of the breast cancer scare. In addition, I have realized since he left how abusive (not physical) a situation it was, and that nobody should ever be treated the way I was. It's a long, sordid story, and I won't go into it here. But I sincerely believe he did not know the damage he was doing, and he has apologized repeatedly for it. I have told him that I accept his apology, but cannot forgive him since he continues to do things that hurt me, namely, continuing to see this other woman.
In light of this, I cannot take him back. But that being said, I am okay. Really. I have moments where it's tough, but I have the most incredible friends who have been there for me. I recognize what lead to the problems, I understand my own culpability in the failure of the marriage, and I know what I need to look for in the future to avoid falling into the same patterns. But I am glad it's over. I won't go into details here, but I've been waiting for something to happen for a long time, and when it finally happened, it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. Most of the times I find myself getting upset, I realize it's more because of the change than missing him. Scared that I have to get a job after being out of the workforce, or scared about going back to school, or even scared about making sure there's milk in the fridge since I can't ask anyone to pick it up for me on their way home.
Every one of my friends has told me that I am incredibly strong, and they notice a difference in the way I carry myself. And I am very strong. I am working, have gotten accepted into school, and am financially secure.
So, if you've added me to your prayer list, please don't make it that my husband will return. He was not a good husband. And please don't ask for strength for me. I have that already. Please ask God to send a kind, honest, wise, and confident man when I'm ready for such a person. Please ask Him to give me wisdom and an open heart. And please tell Him "thank you". It may not be the kind of thing you would normally thank Him for, but I think that his leaving me was the biggest blessing I've ever been given. And oddly enough, please ask God to help my ex. He's struggling in many ways. And while I can say that he brought it on himself, I don't like seeing anyone fall into destructive patterns.
posted by: PastorDave (reply)
post date: 05.14.09 (5:54 pm)
Reply to: intricategirl
O.K. Will do!
You will see yourself emerge as a person of even greater character and quality. It's tough that it would take this experience. I hope you hang around here and allow us to get some bits and pieces of this exciting unfolding of your new life!
posted by: intricategirl (reply)
post date: 05.14.09 (6:12 pm)
Reply to: PastorDave
Worthwhile lessons are never easily learned.
It is exciting. A bit scary sometimes, but I'm looking forward to it. The plan is to finish my BA, and then move on to law school to become a real estate lawyer. I don't know quite how to make the school schedule work out yet, but I am motivated enough to make it happen.
